the wonders of acupuncture

So i'm just back from my second acupuncture treatment.

I went feeling stressed, upset, angry about losing a close friend, worried about my daughter, off sick from school, whom I had to leave with my Very Welsh Mother, who is basically furious about life in general at the moment, so I was pretty sure that three hours with my ten year old wouldn't help much.

So I drove off, following detailed directions (discount for going to her house). It was about a half hour drive, and I didn't need to stop. Then I got lost, so by the time I did find her I was even more stressed, almost in tears and desperately needing the loo.

She is a calm, wise, beautiful person though; or so she seems to me after two meetings. Just her energy calmed me down straight away; plus immediate use of a clean toilet!



We sat down and talked about my physical and emotional symptoms and then she began the treatment. Two halves: one in my back/bottom for 15 minutes, one in my hands/arms and legs/feet. She is building up to the abdomen as I'm worried about having needles there.

Again I found it incredibly relaxing; the needles do hurt, sting, or occasionally hit a nerve as they go in, but then you feel nothing.

I found myself talking about how much anger I was holding in. how I am walking around angry, furious with my ex Mr Sleezeball for not cleaning his fucking canal boat and leading me to get so ill which then led to my immune system weakening and somehow the IC arriving. I blame him, all the time. She said the first step to emotional recovery was to simply acknowledge this fact: that I am nurturing my anger, feeding it, almost using it as a prop now - the whole 'it's not fair', 'why is this happening to me?' that we've all been through.

 It goes without saying that it's unfair; illness always is.

But as long as I cling onto my anger with my ex I continue hold onto a hot coal and burn myself. I said I found the thought of forgiving him absolutely unthinkable: that I just could not ever, ever do it.

She said go slowly. The first step is to take personal responsibility and try to separate the anger from him. He is gone now - thank god - and I never have to deal with him or his shit again. The residual feelings are mine and mine only, and I need to own them in order to have a chance of dealing with them.

Again she said she has seen so many bladder/cystitis patients (she's only had 2 with IC but many with bacterial problems) with anger as their primary emotion.

Afterwards I felt incredibly relaxed, relieved, and now I feel very noise sensitive. Kids are running around making a lot of noise and yet I don't want to shout at them! I just wish I could go to sleep! I feel less upset about the loss of my toxic friendship and even remembered some happy moments from years ago and could smile about them, which 24 hours later is quite amazing.

I already had a break from the constipation again, like last week. And slightly less bladder pain this afternoon.

The most miraculous thing was that for the whole hour I was in there I didn't need a wee. I realised this about half way through the treatment. Was almost scared to mention it in case I jinxed it, but when I stood up afterwards, the desperate urgency had eased.

So far I would definitely recommend it to anyone considering this as a viable alternative therapy.